Behind the Scenes

You know what I think is cool? My eye color.

I’m sure some people will view that statement as self-centered, but I am of the belief that if people can go on and on about everything they don’t like about themselves, then I can talk about what I do like.

But I digress.

So my eyes.

If you look at them from a distance – or even just in poor lighting – they appear extremely dark. Almost black. Like, you can hardly fathom there being any distinct color in them at all.

But if you get up close – or the light is shining on them – it’s immediately clear that they are in fact hazel. Warm brown close to the pupil, with a grey-green rounding them out.

Pretty cool, isn’t it?

As I looked at them in the mirror and got to thinking, my silly, little brain started working up an analogy again.

But this one really punched me in the gut.

Because I am often like my eyes.

I keep people at a distance and never allow them to see, well, the truth.

It’s not that I ever intend to deceive people; it’s just easier to let them think that all I am is what I seem to be at first glance.

Do you ever do that? I like to think I’m not alone in that, and I’m fairly certain I’m not.

It’s simpler to hide. Showing your true colors (pun intended) means opening yourself up – yes, to love, but also to hurt.

But why do we so fear rejection?

Why do we get so caught up in “it’s happened before, so it’s sure to happen again”?

Why do we place so much stock in what others think about us?

Maybe some people don’t like hazel eyes. Does that mean I should always stay far away from people or never be in a well-lit room? Should I just wear sunglasses or cover my eyes all the time?

Yes, it sounds silly. It’s supposed to. It’s called “being irrational.”

So why do we accept it as “just the way things are”?

Why have we let filters and fake personalities become our culture and identities?

This is what I know: God gave me hazel eyes – just like he gave me an introverted nature, a brutally honest mind, and a passionate-to-a-fault personality.

And here’s the honest-to-goodness truth: not everyone likes those things about me. I don’t even like those things about me 100% of the time.

But I am who I am – faults and failures and all. Every part of me is a beautiful testimony; handwritten by the same God that formed the sun, moon, and stars.

Pretty cool, isn’t it?

So I’m daily learning to stop the hiding. It’s dumb, and it only ever hurts me or someone else.

I hope you’ll take this to heart as well. You never know who needs to see the parts of you that you try so hard to hide. Is it really worth it to waste your life, pretending to be something you’re not?

Easy answer, my friend.

It’s not.

You’re so fantastically wonderful, and you don’t even realize it.

I pray that today you do.

And honestly, if you won’t take my word for it, go read Psalm 139. It is entirely a testament of just how cool you are to God.

You and I matter so much – even our “messy stuff.”

Even my hazel eyes.

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